Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Don't watch this...

...if you enjoy soccer to any degree and currently have any liquid in your mouth. I'm just sayin'...

And, no, I will not mention how many of these things I have done in my 'career'.

Enjoy!

Monday, October 27, 2008

To consider when voting...

Yesterday was a beautiful Carolina Sunday. Among the various activities that the day involved was a sunny afternoon with a lawn chair and some reading material. The fact that it was all in full view of the kids enjoying their bike-riding was an added bonus. I chose to peruse a recent edition of the "Answers" magazine from the folks at the Answers in Genesis ministry. I happened upon an article that I thought was timely in light of the voting that our nation will have the privilege of doing in the coming days (or, in the case of the Bowers, enjoyed by taking advantage of the 'early voting' option here in NC). I share the link here with the hope that you will read it and be challenged as I was. I would love to hear your thoughts after doing so.

Here's the link

Happy self-governing!

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Too Many Choices

I try to live a simple life. I really do. In fact, I can be pretty much a simpleton at times. Not much fuss to me and nothing too fancy. And it also doesn't take much to confuse me either. But this is getting to be a little too much.

I guess if you lead a simple life, many decisions are already made for you. What some call lack of initiative, others trumpet as efficiency. And we try to be efficient. But there are two examples that I have come across recently that perplex me. And they both have to do with choices.

Among the first things I do most every morning of my life is take a shower. This is typically not a good time to force me into a choice. But the other day, there I was. Just me and a bar of soap and not one, not two, but...well, I actually stopped counting at three, but I'm not really sure how many there were. Bottles of shampoo. Sarah is extremely gifted at many things. Finding free shampoo is among them. Did you know you can get free toiletries from your local pharmacy? Explaining how that happens is for another time, but let me give you the end result. You get lots of types of shampoo. And if you're not careful, they can all end up in the shower stall at the same time.

There was a 'for oily hair' shampoo. There was a 'for normal hair' shampoo. There was even a 'for close to normal hair that you think might be starting to get a little oily' shampoo. OK, maybe not that last one, but I wouldn't doubt it is in the works. There was even one called a 'repair shampoo'! Repair? I had no idea there were so many types of hair, let alone a shampoo to deal with them. Apparently, Sarah tried one and didn't like it. (Simpletons like me don't have opinions about one's shampoo.) It's still in there though it was replaced by something else. And then my in-laws were visiting and along with their joy, merriment and general good times, they brought a couple more types of shampoo to thwart the evil that lurks within their hair. With the new flight restrictions regarding quantities of liquids, it makes perfect sense that it was just better to leave their shampoo here with us. I think a few of the shampoos got to know each other and formed a new type or two. And I believe the green one and the blue one had to be separated. One can't just go about combining these shampoos together. One must use caution.

So now when I close that shower curtain, I begin my day with an important decision that I must immediately make. What kind of hair do I have? And that quickly transitions to 'which one did Sarah say she didn't like again?'. And then there's these bottles of 'body wash'...

So anyway, the other night William is feeling a bit 'punky' for the first time in his five and a half months of life. And by 'punky' I mean that mom and dad decide that we will go the route of some OTC medicinal assistance. I don't like to put that kind of stuff in my body and that generally affects my parenting too. But even simpletons like me understand that everybody will be happier in the morning if we just make this exception. So it's off to Walmart for some magical elixir.

I'm not exactly sure how many thousands of square feet our local W is (oh, don't think I don't know that we can all just call it the big 'W'...), but I must admit that I was somewhat surprised at how many of them were devoted to curing the many varied ills of your local family in need. It actually played out like a comedy sketch. Well, to me it did anyway.

I had an inkling that a significant search was going to be involved before I left that evening. (After all, if there are fourteen kind of shampoos in our household alone...) My game plan was to simply look for the term 'infant' on the boxes, bottles, or what have you. From there I would start checking out symptoms and come to a conclusion. I scheduled about seven minutes.

Twenty minutes later, I had concluded that while I still hadn't found what I had come looking for, I would mark certain spots for future potential ailments that could befall our family. There was a whole wall of medicinal help based on malady (cold, allergy, left-handedness, indecision), age range (infant...which was labeled as 2-3 years old on one label...please explain that one to me!..., child between five and forty-two with a birth month during the winter and in an odd-numbered year, and ageless...probably for the simpletons), and other helpful characteristics (you can drink your medicine, chew it, mix it with your favorite Mexican dish, or attach it directly to various parts of your body for optimal affect). Who knew?

While I could amuse myself with my plethora of choices, it didn't go so well with others on a similar quest. One lady and her son could not narrow their choice down before their husband/father had taken the car back to get an oil change and tire rotation, practiced casting with a new rod'n'reel, and made out a wish list of electronic goodies for the soon-coming holiday season. I think they decided to just deal with the sneezing and dripping that was going on and save the money for one of those gadgets for dad. He must have been good this year.

But I was not afforded that opportunity. I had to press on. I ended up buying the two least expensive boxes that had the term 'infant' on them and hoped for the best. And, yes, I felt silly when I got home and realized that one of them was for 2-3 year olds.

Maybe choices tend to paralyze you as they do me. Well, that's fine. But this Walmart nation of ours does help when we least expect it. And those of you sanguine, like-the-color-red, have-been-to-Europe-before, was-in-a-car-accident-in-the-last-four-and-a-half-years, under-six-feet-tall, don't-know-how-to-tie-one-of-those-fancy-Boy-Scout-knots, 26-45 year olds with slightly oily hair and a sniffle know exactly what I'm talking about.

Saturday, October 4, 2008

I thought this was funny...


Not that there are many of you out there to notice or anything...

Saturday, September 27, 2008

it's SOMEBODY'S birthday!!!!

Today is my lovely wife's birthday. Along with the festivities of the day, I wanted to send her this simple yet heart-felt gift from me. Sarah, the following are among the many reasons why I joyfully rise and bless you (Proverbs 31:28):
• I love you with an increasing love – I love you more than I ever have before. And before the new day dawns, somehow that love will grow even more.
• You are my best friend – Foibles, shortcomings, less-than-ideal traits? Yup, I got ‘em. But there you are putting a shine in my soul. It seems trite to say that I don’t deserve you, but when I stop to realize that you have chosen to be my friend, I am simply in awe.
• Joy and happiness – Sixteen years ago this month, we started our ‘formal’ relationship. I have lived a good life. Pleasant is how I would describe the vast majority of every aspect of my life. But the years with you have been characterized by a deep joy that is hard to put into words. When I am around you, I am closer to becoming the man that I desire to be. When I away from you, I long.
• Your ‘phone’ voice – I don’t mind it…really.
• Motherhood – There are four people on the planet who view you as the greatest woman who ever lived. And daddy makes five.
• Sacrifice – A couple of weeks ago, we went to Target as a family. As we were checking out, we realized that everybody in the family got one thing (clothing, shoes, etc). And your ‘item’ was an everyday household food item. I owe you one (or one million).
• Content – This word beautifully describes you. You tremendously bless me with your display of this attractive characteristic. You don’t know how much I appreciate that. But I intend to start making sure you do.
• Unique quirks – You have some. But when I smile and shake my head at your satisfying enjoyment of eating a potato (a POTATO!!), I am not laughing. I am, well…I am loving everything about you. (and, yes, you will have the privilege of experiencing many potatoes throughout the course of your day today!)
• You got skillz! – When you get an idea in your head, I love it when you put your top-notch research abilities to work and start sniffing around. By doing so, you have saved us vast amounts of money, found us better living arrangements, educated the entire family, improved our health, and grown our relationships.
• Your laugh – Insert ‘excuse-me-pastor-but-somebody-is-tickling-me’ story here.
• Red/Green/Purple/Yellow/Blue/White/Black/etc – You look good in any color.
• Nobility – I pray that my daughters will follow in your footsteps and that my sons will be blessed by their wife as much as I have by mine.
• Change – You’re not the same person I married. You’re better.

This list is embarrassingly incomplete and constantly growing. I love you very much. Happy Birthday!

Thursday, September 11, 2008

And Just So You Know

It works for spouses too.

What I Do When I Need a Big Gulp of 'Daddy Juice'

I like foolproof things. No chance of failing. No doubt about their success. If you are like me regarding that, and are a parent, then read on.

Let’s face it. People, even our own flesh and blood…even the cute and cuddly little kind, don’t always do what we want them to do. Sometimes that is a reflection of our own sin and misplaced desires. And sometimes it points to theirs. But all human relationships have ‘bumps in the road’. But I’ve got the perfect solution.

Actually, it’s not so much the solution as it is a tool to soften the hard hearts that may be in the way of it. Or maybe it’s a wonderful provision to help celebrate and remember the fix that grace enables us.

If and when you find yourself in a hard or difficult situation that can vaguely match the above, I’ve got a suggestion for you. Watch.

Watch your children.

Watch your children sleep.

Just go right into their room when they are good and sleep-consumed. Keep the hall light on and the door open. And just watch them sleep. It will be a tremendously peaceful experience. It will adjust and improve your attitude toward them. It will grow your love for them. It will increase your gratitude for them. It will multiply your prayers for them. You smile and whisper a prayer. And they sleep. It’s a great trade.

Anyway, I, uh, speak from experience here. Trust me, it’ll work.